I was not sure how to start this new blog. There is no clear way to define Part 1 and Part 2 of my life. No neat little 'wrap-up' or clever bylines.
Somehow it feels like today was the line. It was crossed. Today I woke up in my bed on Mothers Day with not 3 little people to spoil me but 6.
It was humbling and overwhelming. I was caught between deep gratitude and deep pain. I saw my children stumbling through their emotions as they endeavoured to continue traditions their Dad started with them all those years ago. I watched K's kids give so much of themselves to me despite wrestling their own grief and sorrow as they miss their mom so much on this day.
Both K and myself both struggle deeply with anger at what our children have to face. Losing a parent is just not right and it never gets easier for us to watch our kids being brave; stumbling and then being brave all over again.